Too Much Pressure

I laugh everytime I see that commercial they show on MTV where the high school girl is basically squished flat because she says she has to deal with too much peer pressure. But even I, at 30, have too much pressure. Here are 5 sources of my personal pressure:

#1 Pressure: TO BE SKINNY
At 5'8", I am never going to weigh 100 pounds, not even 120 pounds. I would be skin and bones. I am perfect weight for my height yet I still get told by society, T.V., my friends and even my dad that I need either work out more, lose weight or tone up. It's never good enough to be satisfied with yourself. I've never been one to make myself throw up and I love to eat. I also think it's crazy that P!nk's song and video "Stupid Girls" makes fun of the Hollywood starlets on being scantily clothed and making themselves puke to be skinny and yet P!nk doesn't have an ounce of fat on her. It's hypocrisy!

#2 Pressure: TO MAKE MONEY
At 30, I should probably own a house or condo, own a car and even have a savings account, but alas I have none of the above. All I have are student loans, credit card bills and now a huge hospital bill because the profession that I have chosen does not allow me to have ongoing health insurance. I love reading about those top ten billionaires that are under 30 who really didn't make their money by earning it, they inherited it from a trust fund or a rich, dead family member. Way to work it!

#3 Pressure: RECYCLE!
My feelings on recycling is that it is a super big waste of time. Unless you are willing to go down to the dump and physically watch them put your supposed recycled crap in a different junk pile and watch it get mulched up and reused, don't kid yourself that it actually happens. It's just another scam to get us to stress out and get on medication because the world is coming to an end. Come on, people, you can think of another reason to take Zanax, can't you?

#4 Pressure: EAT ORGANIC
Go ahead and eat organic if you want. But my dad is a microbiologist and according to him, we're better off eating the antibiotics and pesticides than the meat full of grubby viruses (i.e. bird flu) and grubby grubs (i.e. pin worms) on your stupid, sliced for you, packaged organic apples. Plus, organic food is way more expensive and should be called "yuppie" if we were still in the "80's. There is a lady that comes through the hotel that is on a complete organic and macrobiotic diet and she looks like death warmed over all the time. Hmmm, coincidence? I don't think so.

#5 Pressure: TO DRINK MORE THAN ONE DRINK AT THE BAR
OK, this is totally self induced, so I can't complain. But, apparently I drink like I'm in a race and my feet are the finish line and I puke on them. God forbid I sit at the bar and sip on one or to drinks and go home. No way! Not Jennifer! Let's see how many drinks I can guzzle down before I feel like complete crap, which by the way don't go hand in hand.

So there you go, just some of the pressure I have to deal with in my life. Why can't I just live my life to the fullest and not worry about things. And if I dwelled on all five of these at the same time, I would probably end up in a fetal position in my closet!

*To Esta: Eat some meat! You need some color in your cheeks!
**To my guy friends: You're never going to find a Paris Hilton!
***To my dad: I'll never look like Mom, Whitney Houston (cocaine addict) or even Angie Harmon! Sorry :(